This week has been a good one. I have been a part of Jon Acuff's "Start Experiment" on Facebook, based on his book "Start". He has put groups together and is giving daily tasks and the groups encourage each other. Yesterday was powerful. Writing the fears that hold me back on paper.
Two stood out to me. Fear of putting my job/ministry ahead of my family and fear of becoming disciplined. The first is obvious for anyone in church work. As the child of a church worker, I should know what to do, but I don't manage my time well and that leads to my family suffering. Which leads into the second one. I am an odd musician where I have only made it as far as I have based on talent and minimal practice. I have spent a long time in many areas of my life being undisciplined and it shows. I am extremely overweight, lazy, and in pretty much everything, do just enough to get by. The good news? I can change that today. The challenge? Those voices in my head reminding me that I have spent so long this way that it would be impossible to change. But I answer those fears and questions with one question. What would happen if I actually did become disciplined? Would I lose weight? Would I feel better? Would I have stronger relationships? Would I be a better musician? WOULD I BE A BETTER ME? Absolutely! The change will not be easy, in fact, it will be extremely hard work. I don't know if I'm ready for it, but I know I can't continue down this road of mediocrity, "good enough" or whatever I try to justify myself with. I hang on to the words of my Grandmother. "Good, better, best. Never let it rest. Until the good is better and the better is best."
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