A 60 year old lawnmower, Father's Day, serving God and serving others

Today is Father's Day. I am blessed to be the father of two amazing daughters. Ella, who is 4 and Emily who is almost 19 months. Having girls has changed my life in many, many, many ways, specifically the amount of glitter, tea parties, and the knowledge of Disney princesses that has come into my brain. I am not complaining, as I have been and will continue to teach them about sports, and share with them the things that I love, like yard work, growing flowers, and grilling food.

We spent the weekend at my in-laws. They have a trailer on a lake. OK, here in Texas, there aren't many lakes. This isn't a natural lake. It's a reservoir. It rained on Saturday, so we didn't get to go out on the boat. That's OK. It gave me time to think, pray, read, and spend time with my girls. Upon coming home and unloading, and after reading Ella a story, and having her "read" to me, I wanted to get some lawn mowing done. I haven't had luck with lawnmowers. So, I am currently borrowing my dad's 60+ year old lawnmower. He likes to say, "It cuts more by accident than others do on purpose!" This is true. My grandfather bought it back in the 1950's. My grandfather used it, my dad used it, and now I used it. It's not fancy to look at, doesn't have a grass catcher, no bells or whistles, but it does the job. As I was mowing, my thoughts went to my dad and my grandfather. I am extremely blessed to have such great examples of faith in my life. My grandfather died when I was 9, but I still remember his love of and care for african violets, him helping me build a birdhouse (which is hanging from the tree in my backyard), and his service throughout the years in the life of the congregation he was a part of. He was always willing to give to others, and serve.

My dad is a retired pastor. Growing up as a PK, I struggled with life in that fishbowl. Driving back from the lake today, I was thinking a lot of about my dad. While my dad and I had our disagreements as I was growing up, something I now heavily chalk up to us being a lot alike, and even though he didn't say he loved me all that often (something I learned more about in a conversation with my aunt about their upbringing), I knew that my dad would always be there for me. My freshman year of college, I had arranged a ride home with a girl who lived in Milwaukee, and the week before, her car broke down. What does my dad do? In the midst of a busy Christmas season, he got up at 2 AM, drove the 8 hours out to Nebraska, picked us all up, turned around and drove back. Never let me or anyone else drive! Even now, all these years later, he doesn't let me forget! But whenever he was needed, by those in the congregation, or friends of those in the congregation, he was there. Always giving, always ready to drop anything for those in need. Even in his retirement, he filled in for my uncle after he could not continue to serve due to health reasons, and he's helped out at other churches. No complaints, always willing to serve.

So where does all of these threads of thoughts lead to? Looking in the mirror, I'm a lot like that lawnmower I used. I'm nothing fancy. Neither was my dad or my grandfather. Neither are any of us. We are, however, all gifted by God with many gifts, talents, abilities and desires to serve. However, in my case, and in the case of many others, we are quick to make excuses why we don't do a complete job, why we don't serve or love others as we should. I was looking back at my college transcripts last week, for something unrelated. I graduated with a 3.0 grade average. Nothing to sneeze at, but I know that in most of those classes, I never put in a full effort. I was in bad habits and those continued after graduation. Ultimately, it has led to me not serving God and serving others as fully as I can, or should, for that matter. I read a couple of great books this weekend that really helped to challenge my thinking about how I do what I do, what I need to do to better serve others. Figuring out how to do it, and then actually doing it are two different things. I'm great at talking. Always have been. It's been a positive many times and many more times, it hasn't. That's where my challenge is at. Being a father has given me a lot of new insights into my relationship with God. But His love, care, grace and mercy far surpasses mine. And I thank Him for that every moment of every day. But, being a father helps me to realize that I'm not living for myself. I never have, but I have two little girls that need that line of service to God and the church continued. I'm their daddy. That's all they get. So I have to do what I need to do to show it to them! So I will try...