Reflections on Day 3

Now that I have been able to get a little girl who was fighting sleep zonked out for the night, I can update with my thoughts for today.

The day started with one of those revelations....one where it was completely unrelated to why I'm here, but it was a deeper understanding of things. You see, this has been the first time for me staying any length of time under my parents' roof since getting married. This was the part of the trip I was a little hesitant about, mainly because my parents still treat me like I'm about 8. I was praying fervently for tolerance of this fact. But in an unrelated discussion to music with my dad this morning, I realized something. Now, I love my parents, and they are wonderful people, but they have their quirks. My dad has to find something negative in just about anything, and a few things have happened this week that drew my attention to that fact. But the revelation moment was this. Whenever I played the organ for worship when I was younger, the feedback I would receive from my dad was, "It was good, but I heard some mistakes." Add to that the comments from my mother about always being nervous when I play, and that I play too loud, along with the wonderful adage from my Grandmother: "Good, better, best, never let it rest, until the good is better and the better is best", and my revelation was this. I was allowing those comments, even to this very day, to make me unsure of myself, and to not do things that I felt were challenging. As I was showering, I was praying about this and asked God to help me to listen to the positive voices in my head, and to look for encouragement today, and every day. And God didn't disappoint.

My first seminar was led by Marva Dawn. Not a bad way to start listening to a wonderfully gifted woman of God who has written extensively on worship. A woman that, when you first look at her, strikes you as a very sweet grandmother, but what deep thoughts come out of that mind! I have read her book "Reaching Out without Dumbing Down", and I think that will be my book to read for August, as I haven't read it for a while. The seminar was entitled "Is the Church Failing?" A very ominious title, but her point was this: When we look at numbers, yes, mainline Protestant church membership is declining. However, the church is more than just numbers. The two main questions we discussed are: Is God glorified? And Is the church Authentic? Many of the points she made were obvious. We in the church have become very tied in to the culture around us, which in and of itself isn't a bad thing, however, that consumer mentality that goes along with the world around as it relates to church is. Have you ever heard yourself saying, "I didn't really like that hymn we sang" or "The pastor's sermon just really didn't get me today" or "The organ sure was loud today"? The point is, worship isn't about us or our feelings, our likes or our dislikes. The glorifying of God doesn't just stop at the church door. As Christians, our glorifying God continues out into every facet of our lives. Can you look in the mirror and say, yeah, everything I do glorifies God? I know I can't. But I want to strive to do this!

Next was a seminar on assigning handbells to ringers. The biggest point that I walked away from this was a reminder that my role and responsibility is to set up my choir to succeed. Sometimes that means not always having people where they WANT to be, but where their abilities are best used and challenged! If we're not challenged, we won't grow.

Then, after a music reading session of Thanksgiving, Advent and Christmas music that really didn't appeal to me (I know what I said about glorifying God, but I just didn't like the music!!) we had a time of worship. This was my first actual experience with hearing a Baptist preacher, and I have to say, it was impactful. He preached on Jude 24-25, and brought out a great image that I will hang on to for a while. He talked about seeing an opera. He really enjoys going to operas, doesn't really get all of it, but in taking it all in, he enjoys it. At the end of the opera, there is a standing ovation and cheers of "bravo, bravo". He said, it wouldn't have made any difference had he just stood there with his arms crossed and not joined in the cheers. But, as he did, he said that time and space stood still, and there he was, cheering with those who saw it and cheered when it first premiered. A very interesting analogy for worship. If we look around on Sundays, we may see a few people not really singing praises to God, or participating in worship, but when we do, and we give ourselves completely to that worship, time and space DO stand still, and there we are transported with all the saints, all the believers who have gone before us in praising God! I just got goosebumps while typing that, because that truly is exciting just to think about!

This afternoon was more handbell information and a music reading session, and tomorrow I get the opportunity to learn about putting our Music Ministry on the Web and an Introduction to Taize worship. Then another reading session, come back to my parents' house, pick up Ella and Gershwin, load up the car and head home.

This week has been unbelievably refreshing for me. It has been a learning experience, a reminder of things that I haven't been doing and should, and a few "a-ha" moments as well. I am very excited to take all of this home and translate it into how Music Ministry happens at King of Kings. The biggest thing that God laid on my heart in that regard is that Music Ministry at King of Kings can, should, and will be a place for people to use their gifts to God's glory, practice sharing God's love and forgiveness with one another, and joyfully fellowship with one another in the good times and bad.